I don’t have the energy to explain my saturday night in detail.
So I’ll just say…
East Village fail. cab back to Bleecker. cover at wicked willy’s - no way. wandered down Macdougal. found The Grizzly Pear. MGMT! get table at the front. annoying guy tries to pet Jocelyn. Boys talk to us. Boys buy us drinks. they play MGMT again! Alexis talks to 30 year old foreverrrr. Jspo leaves to get street food. I talk to 30-year-old’s funny friend. Jspo calls - she’s lost. Funny friend leaves. I go outside and find her. We go back inside. Tall blue-eyed blonde guy and short brunette guy come over to our table. I think they are friends. Short guy buys us drinks. Pulls me to the bar to talk to him. “It’s only fair.” Eww. Jspo leaves. I try to talk to tall blonde, but short guy keeps interrupting. I find out they don’t know eachother. Alexis still talking to 30y.o. Lights come on. What to do? Short guy proposes an “after-hours bar.” Fine, we’re game. We convince tall blonde to come with us - hey, he’s Swedish. Short guy pulls us out of the bar, and chases down a cab. Alexis and I run after him. Blonde Swedish guy runs after us. His Swedish friends run after him. 30y.o. runs after Alexis. Short guy, Swedish guy, Alexis, and I are the only ones to make it. We speed uptown. Swedish guy worries “We must be in Harlem by now!!” Short guy gets angry “Just shut your mouth, Lars.” We decide to call Swedish guy “Lars” from that point forward. Get out in the middle of fucking nowhere. Lars says “Let’s all go to my hotel room. Vee haf drinks! Vee make party! My friends there too!” Short guy becomes angry guy. They almost fight. Angry guy scares us. Me and Alexis start to walk away. Lars comes after us. Angry guy marches away. Angry guy comes back and yells at Lars. We get in cab, without angry guy, to go to Lars’ hotel. Lars speaks to cabdriver - in Mandarin. Wtf. Lars tells us about his ex-girlfriend in Korea. We get to hotel - Lars doesn’t have a key. Concierge lets us in. We make drinks and sit outside on the huge balcony w/ view of the Empire State Building. Impressive. Lars’ friends join us. Martin and Whatshisface. We’re up til 7am, they’re all sweet. Me and Alexis decide to sleep on the pull out bed. This is actually Martin’s bed. Martin joins us, on Alexis’s side. Lars stands in doorway. “You’re all sleeping there? But I haf all this room!” We laugh. Martin goes to bathroom. I ask Alexis “You want me to stay here with you?” Alexis says “Yes.” Martin comes back. “You ok if I leave?” “Fiiiiine.” I jump out of bed before the word leaves her mouth. I find Lars “That bed vas too crowded for you! I know!” Yeah, whatever. Lar’s goes to bathroom, comes out in white boxers. Daaaaaamn. Lights go off. Lars gets into bed. I get into bed. Lars kisses me. He’s minty fresh and his lips are cold. Yes - I think of Edward Cullen. He tries for more, but I’m good. Nothing but kissing goes on, but it’s niiiice. I wake up with the well-toned arms of Greek Swedish God wrapped around me. It’s 12o’clock. I wake him up. We wake Alexis and Martin up. We all hang out for a while. Alexis checks out Lars’ body and whispers “He’s glowing.” I think about Edward Cullen again. Lars asks if we exchanged phone numbers. I misunderstand, and think he’s asked if we should exchange phone numbers, and say “Yes.” Lars thinks I’m trying to avoid giving him my number. As if. I give my number, and he calls me to give him mine (or to check that I gave him my real number). I save him in my phone as “The Swede”. We all hug. Alexis and I leave.
Done!
2 years ago